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Xu Tony

4月18日

rhyme of my rhythm

mr. moon knows, my rhythm is the flow i sleep by;

i wont withdraw, the touch of embracing every life.
4月17日

straight from my heart

now there's no crucible,
 
with u smiling in my world,
 
till earth cracked seas drained,
 
i shall never let u go
4月12日

it's been quite a while

quit playing the sad charade

let sanity surpass our ages

hand in hand cross Avalon

ahora y siempre
12月10日

I'Sのアニメバージョンはやっと着た!!

「アイズ」の漫画系列は今までの最高だともう、しかしこの前のOVAはどうみっでもただのからくただけ。別に桂さんの才能と思慮ありや攻めるつもりはななかったけど、とても残念だと思いました。その代わり、俺は何時かあのときどきどきされる感情がもう一度振り返たいって期待して。まっ、チャンスはただいま着陸するみたいだな。。。

12月9日

The Magic of Mind

Cyril is a truly amazing magician. Dwarfed in terms of the glamour or the calibre, we are, nevertheless, also magicians. Maybe Cyril can make a bottle of green tea or a hamburger out of a piece of paper; mankind in general, has done things quite similar.
Since long we have created history, religions, politics, races, monetary systems, fashions... ... ... ... ... ... ...out of nothing, or if put it in a nicer way, out of pure manipulation, integration and differentiation of human minds. I obviously by no mean have any credibility to criticize on the existence of those, but I do believe they are parts of a magic show.
The fundamental characteristic of a magic is the absence of truth. If anyone is 100% truth-obsessed, then he/she should not pay to see the magic show. The audiences here pay the magicians for creating illusions, varieties and excitements in life. Sometimes the magicians are just audience ourselves, manipulating our own life for the sake of living. Getting other people (ourselves) bought in to what we want them (us) to believe, is by all mean, a typical magic trick used in almost all kinds of human activities on earth. Is it vicious, or virtuous for the process of pursuing truth? Is truth involved at all? Does truth exist at the first place?
See, as I write, I am starting to create illusive arguments to build up an image of truth. However, truth is like reality, it doesn't derive from any form of manipulations. It should be the other way around.
Again, another presumptuous argument...

I am young. Hence I am a truth pursuer. And I personally do not love the feeling of manipulating or being manipulated. I am seeing myself slowly getting out of the society rather than getting in, which puts me in no position rethoric about truth.

11月24日

情(1)

挚友为俺庆祝生日,俺饱饱得吃了几块炸鸡,同时许愿自己今年不会得H5N1。餐后俺到他家作客,丫兴致勃勃得给俺介绍MSN SPACES。俺看了他的主页,鄙视道:‘蓝蓝的,傻傻的,微软的,没什么创世纪嘛。’ 正当语音未定,‘轰’的一声,眼前突然一黑,身体顿时有股像神户牛排般轻快的感觉。俺回过神来,才发现身体已经陷入天花板内。俺擦了擦两腿间的血迹,顿时感动得黯然泪下,深情般目视着挚友,抽泣道:‘你っ,你的黯然梦围掌终于练成了!?’
疗伤的时候俺读了丫的日记,其中有篇文章尤其共鸣,将当代儿女私情比喻成攀墙:有的人身怀绝技,攀墙如吃刨冰,翻过一堵,刨了几下,下墙,立即又攀上了另外一堵;有的人更神,趁两墙之间距离不足108cm,双手双脚像成龙般同时爬两堵墙,何其壮观;也有人在闹市中徘徊,目睹着千军万马上墙下墙,静静得等待墙自己塌下来;最后一种人,身上翻墙装备不足,尝试了无数次,即使一心一意,赴汤蹈火,也没有爬上去过。。。俺一直都觉得挚友是属于最后那种人,更加坚信这种人在这攀墙过程中获得的最多。
想着,俺回头看了挚友一眼,他,仍然双手按在俺背肌上,满头大汗,气喘如牛,我感觉到他的精力在不断的冲进我体内。身为一名男优,俺难免有一股叫爽的冲动,但知道这毕竟只是疗伤,也只好咬紧香唇,摒住呼吸,任他处理。。。看了他那眼,才发现他看起来老了许多,精神不振的,大概是攀墙攀得太郁闷了。
俺想好了,俺的圣诞愿望就是丫能高高兴兴攀墙去,攀上攀不上也能快快乐乐走下去。。。

词汇:
1) 神户牛排 --- Kobe Bryant
2)男优 --- 男性演员
11月23日

石丸 拓海

昔からずっと考えていた、もし、この世界は二つの俺に必要なら、その別の俺はいったいどうな顔で生きているのか。。。
その答えを探すためにここにきた、きた分かるってそう信じていました。愚か俺はいつも剣心になりたくて、剣心らしくないまねを振り回すんだ。ほかの俺を探しながら、いまの自分をすべて捨ていた。どっちは本物がよくわかないだけど、せめて名前だけはくれてやる。。。

俺、あたらの名は、石丸拓海。。。